Reflection
Look at me,
You may think you see
Who I really am,
But you'll never know me.
Everyday,
it's as if I play
A part.
Now I see,
If I wear a mask,
I can fool the world,
but I cannot fool my heart.
Who is that girl I see?
Staring straight,
Back at me.
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
I am now,
In a world
Where I have to hide in my heart,
and what I believe in.
But somehow,
I will show the world what's inside my heart,
And be loved for who I am.
Who is that girl I see,
staring straight
back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm
someone else
for all time.
When will my reflection show,
who I am inside?
There's a heart that must be free
to fly
That burns with a need to know
the reason why
Why must we all conceal
What we think
How we feel?
Must there be
a secret me
I'm forced to hide
I won't pretend that I'm
someone else
for all time.
When will my reflection show
who I am inside?
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
hmmz. haven blog 4 sum time. a 2tal of 5 daes. mani tings hav happened. n i dun reallie noe how shld i feel or tink.
on sat 14 august. i went 4 band. but b4 tt went 2 help out at avu. actuallie didnt help lahz. juz appear tt n slack ard. hahaz. then went 2 browse thru all e scholarships booths in e hall. will be usin sum of those as my motivations 2 study. after tt. went back 2 practise abit of bassoon w yee ke-ow. n i tried 2 play trumpet. i sound like rubbishz. i tink i betta stick 2 bassoon. though i m nt playin well 4 it either. went 2 du yang house 2 watch il mare. a korean show lahz. unfortunately. e response wasnt gd. hahaz. n du yang play piano accompanied by his cousin who played e violin. then we sing. so fun. i reallie wan 2 learn e piano. sighz. but i cant. as least 4 tis 2 yrs. supposed 2 watch dim sum dollies at e esplanade. but then marlom khar cldnt go. so in e end. mi n yee ke-ow also nv go. went 2 eat kfc. n went home.
on sundae. 15 august. yee ke-ow cum 2 my house n nua. i was supposedly rushin my analysis 4 e first draft of e pw. unfortunately both of us were distracted. n ended up watch beauty n e beast. reallie like e song. vry nice. n didnt do much work lahz.
as 4 mondae. 16 august. went 2 sch. but was feelin vry sick lahz. was actuallie sick 4 ard 3 wks le. but it was one of those vry bad daes. my whole nose is blocked n i cldnt breathe properly. survive thru 2 lectures n gp. then take blue slip 2 go home. went 2 c e doc. n there goes my fifty dollars. wow liao. so xpensive. i almost fainted when i heard e cost. nvm. aniwae wat i caught is nt flu but sumting 2 do e air spaces linkin e nasal/nostrils. there r infected. n all my mucus/phlegm r yellow in colour. gross. n i didnt c my shuai ge. i m so sad. aniwae. was quite happenin in e evenin. n i look so 2pid lahz. but luckily. i can sleep peacefully. n e others too.
yesterdae. 17 august. go 2 sch w yee ke-ow. n saw my shuai ge. n feel so pai sehz. sighz. mrs yeo didnt cum n mrs singh didnt cum. so our pw is like dead lahz. i officially declared my grp is 'screwed'. hav double lectures. n tze hui sis joined e med fac 4 maths. hahaz. n she ended up doin lit. oh my goodness. n tryin desperately 2 remain awake durin bio prac. was like sitin between 7 out of e 8 guys in my class. hahaz. so funnie lorz. n they tried 2 chase mi away. slack ard after tt. n went 4 lion dance. n realised tt my pe shirt is missin. sighz. i dun noe lahz. but i tink i may quit lion dance. coz. i m nt makin much progress lahz. sighz.n e orientation team 2005 list is out. n i feel... nua. i dun noe how i shld feel. was quite shocked at sum of e names lahz. went 2 causeway pt by my amir mummy's daddy car. hahaz. n was quite giddy frm e drive. so was sleepin durin e journey. went 2 eat w yee ke-ow again.
as 4 2dae. 18 august. i feel tired. aniwae. saw my shuai ge once again. n tis time round. it's even worse. yee ke-ow is sick 2dae. was walkin vry slowly 2dae. while walkin past. i glanced at him twice. n realised tt he is lookin at mi. nua. m i tt obvious? reach sch n realised tt i nv bring alot of stuff. n nv do alot of tutorial. went 4 archery. then physics tutorial. n get back my physics test. i failed. i m so disappointed. reallie vry disappointed. coz tis is e sorta first physics test tt i understand e concepts n got practise. but i still fail. though ms tan said tt i m on e rite track. tt actuallie my methods r correct. juz tt my substitution r incorrect. or i dun noe how 2 use a calculator correctly. went 4 e cancer tok by a professor after sch. after watchin e lunch time concert. muz sae it's quite gd. hahaz. e tok is interestin but i m so tired. tt i dozed off a few times. after tt supposed 2 go 4 band prac. but i seriously cant play w all e phlegm n mucus chokin mi. so went home.
muz sae tis 2 sumwan. i nv sae cheer up coz i been thru e failures w u. no matter wat. i believe n hav strong faith in u. tt u will find ur way back. coz u r nt weak. though both of our academic results r like rubbishz. but wat matter most is e character. if they dun appreciate u. so be it. there will be pple who appreciate u. as long as u nv give up n look 4 e opportunities. jc life sucks. tt's all i can sae. n sorrow is nt a sign of weakness. i understand tt alot of e time. it's becoz of wat happened in e past tt make pple tink in a particular way. tis apply 2 sumwan else. but we r all humans. we r nt perfect. we r emotional. no matter how indifferent we seem 2 be. give in 2 it. but dun wallow in it. u r one of my closest fren. n i noe u r one of e strongest person i noe. will be always here 2 lend u my shoulder. luv u always.
dreaming awae at 8:22 PM
